Less-than-serious Insults

This insult table has been resurrected from the reddit post by V-num. Here's the blurb (modified)...

Inspired by the Scotsman's insult, these pejorative words are sourced from the Wiktionary and put into random tables. They're mainly silly ones plus a few addition DnD-themed additions. Let's hope no-one is offended!

These are something your low-intelligence mooks might shout at the player characters.

Result

You Roll on "Insult Prefix" d12 times (unique results only) Roll on "Insult Noun" Roll on "Insult Suffix"


Subcharts

Insult Prefix (d41)

d41 Result

1

abyss-spawned

2

bent-fingered

3

cantrip-flinging

4

dragon-breath

5

drow-fondling

6

eye-averting

7

ghoul-skinned

8

gnoll-punching

9

goblin-fiddling

10

knife-eared

11

hissy fitting

12

hog-rubbing

13

hussy up

14

jaded

15

lemon-smelling

16

lentil weaving

17

limp wrist

18

moss-growing

19

Netherese

20

noggin-filching

21

numbskulled

22

otyugh-attracting

23

pantaloon-gathering

24

pie-eating

25

pit-yacking

26

plonker-waddling

27

quipper-seething

28

rubber-faced

29

slack-jawed

30

slant-legged

31

snot-eating

32

sobbing

33

spider-licking

34

bed-staining

35

stirge-infested

36

tattling

37

troll-smelling

38

turnip-swindling

39

Weave-breaking

40

wizened

41

woggish

Insult Noun (d35)

d35 Result

1

black pudding

2

bugbear

3

churl

4

crone

5

cur

6

country bumpkin

7

fomorian

8

goon

9

hobgoblin

10

lob

11

marmozet

12

milksop

13

pillock

14

pissant

15

plum

16

quim

17

quisling

18

rapscallion

19

rascal

20

scag

21

scalawag

22

scamp

23

schmuck

24

scoundrel

25

serf

26

shrew

27

simpleton

28

slag

29

slubberdegullion

30

snake-flipper

31

sonnova yea-sayin' cheapskirt

32

toe rag

33

wazzock

34

wildcat

35

yokel

Insult Suffix (d14)

d14 Result

1

who ate all the pies!

2

with no friends!

3

who even magic missiles avoid!

4

that makes trolls seem endearing!

5

with breath like the south end of a north bound ogre.

6

who's so filthy even an otyugh would spit you out.

7

who's so shabbily dressed you look like an orphaned kobold.

8

with all the personality of a gelatinous cube.

9

who's so ugly it looks like you're half way through a polymorph.

10

that smells like a duergar's beard.

11

with the conversational skills of an owlbear.

12

who's as graceful as a one-legged zombie.

13

with an intellect that couldn't light a candle with a struck match.

14

who's as useful as a mirror to a vampire.